WHENEVER I’m about to travel abroad, be it on holiday or on an assignment, two questions enter my mind.
a). Why has that transporter thing from the 1960s series Star Trek still not been invented yet?
And b). Why aren’t there people who offer a professional packing service for people like me?
Don’t get me wrong, I love experiencing new places but the ‘getting there’ aspect just flips my noodle.
Even more so when you’re dealing with the ‘hurry up and wait’ attitude of the armed forces.
I remember on one particular trip home from some Middle Eastern country, I flew to Kuwait three times. And I’ve never really understood why.
I guess the military have a reason for the approach. ‘Get there just in case’ I guess.
Anyway, it’s not just the military. My issue is with flying in general really.
I just wish the whole ‘getting there process’ was as easy as stepping onto a 70s disco type dancefloor floor and beaming over.
I have wished for a Star Trek transporter on so many trips.
But of course before this stage I need to pack.
And this is a skill only my present wrapping skills rival.
I’m sure it’s an art form. And a skill I sadly don’t possess.
I know Afghanistan’s summers are hot – like 50 degrees hot – but I’m of the thinking that I still need to pack a few jumpers. Why? God knows.
Better to take it and not need it than to not have it at all right?
Hmmmm... but weight restrictions.
How do military personnel do it?
They seem to have so much, but so little at the same time.
Knowing that you are deploying to a war-zone, be it for a week or three months, does affect your thinking and your mood to a certain extent.
We’ve been talking about this particular trip since last August.
That’s a long time to consider things, and to have something playing on your mind.I think a part of you just shuts down. It just switches off.
I can’t put my finger on exactly what it is, but my girlfriend can sense it.
You focus on what’s ahead.
You don’t necessarily want to talk about it, you just want to go and do it.
There are also some things in life which are guaranteed.
And in this case, number one is that your mother will not agree with any part of what you’re proposing.
The experience, the fact it will look good on the CV, the money... nope.
Not one hint of empathy. Understandably I guess.
Mothers can’t comprehend anything which will put their sons or daughters in possible harm’s way.
Those born into military families are different I guess. It’s taken and understood.
Me, I think people think I’m mad.
But hey, haven’t we all got to be a bit mad to live in this crazy world?
Friday 25 March 2011
Monday 14 March 2011
How not to blow yourself up, and other useful advice
IT’S my birthday today and I’ve just been given the most important gift in my 33 years – advice on how to spot an Improvised Explosive Device.
For the past two days I’ve been on a Contractors on Deployed Operations (CONDO) training course as part of my own pre-deployment training.
In a matter of weeks I will have swapped the save haven of Devon for the badlands of Afghanistan.
This will be my third deployment to the war-torn country in the last six years – and by far the longest and most demanding.
More than 1,300 Royal Marines, Royal Navy personnel, Army commandos and reservists from Plymouth will be in charge of providing security in Afghanistan.
I will be living and working alongside hundreds of these servicemen and women for up to three months.
As well as filing stories, blogs and pictures for The Herald and its website, I’ll also be presenting, editing and filming pieces for the British Forces Broadcasting Service (BFBS).
This footage will be beamed to British forces outposts all across the world (think of a dedicated news and programme channel for the forces) as well as the internet (www.bfbs.com/news/).
These stories will also appear on The Herald’s website for you to view.
In the past couple of weeks I have been asked countless times ‘why’ I would want to deploy for such a length of time.
I guess the reason is for the experience. And also to help paint a better picture of what our boys and girls are up to.
So today, in preparation for my trip – or ‘summer holiday’ as some members of staff at Herald HQ are jokingly referring to it – I’m in Buckinghamshire learning how to stay safe while working and living in one of the most dangerous places on the planet.
“BFBS?” the course lecturer and former Royal Marine begins.
“That’s the channel the Taliban watch right?!”
Great.
Lesson one – the biggest threat to British forces personnel deployed on the ground is the Improvised Explosive Device or ‘IED’.
A couple of years ago no-one had heard of an IED. Sadly, due to the rising level of fatalities caused by the nasty device, it’s now become common knowledge. Even my mum knows what an IED is.
In warfare an IED is a key part of fighting, and sadly the Taliban have realised this.
For those who don’t know IEDs – or roadside bombs – are laid to take out either people, or vehicles.
Often they’re not designed to kill. More maim those affected.
The idea is that someone steps on one, loses a leg or legs, and others come to help exposing them to gunfire.
If that’s not nasty enough to read consider this – the Taliban are reportedly running out of shells and explosives left by the Russians when they gave up their war in the country in the 1980s.
Instead they are now making their own bombs filling harmless looking water containers with nuts, bolts and washers to create what is known as a ‘shipyard confetti’ or ‘bucket’ bomb.
“Some are lucky and they lose a foot or suffer an upper body injury,” the course lecturer tells us.
“Some aren’t so fortunate and lose multiple limbs or die.”
Ignorance is bliss at the best of times. Right now I wish I hadn’t been paying attention to the last five minutes.
The lecturer continues with a story about witnessing the atrocities first-hand, and tells us about ‘mine necklaces’ or ‘daisy chains’.
These bombs are linked so that when one goes off and a casualty is dragged to what appears to be a safe place, another goes off in that location.
I’m quick to learn the Taliban have developed their nasty tactics.
Be it radio-controlled, victim operated or suicide bomber vest, the techniques for killing are expanding rapidly.
Aside from first aid, the second major lesson of the CONDO training was all about ‘conduct after capture (including kidnapping, hostage taking and abduction)’.
We’re told ‘to increase the chance of release – stay positive. Also, ‘don’t stare (avoid eye contact)’, ‘follow instructions’, ‘be prepared to be drugged’ and ‘bound and gagged’ and ‘speak when spoken to’.
Although the vast majority of our work in-theatre will be carried out in a British military camp, there will be occasions when we deploy ‘outside the wire’.
So this advice is invaluable. Much like the servicemen and women taking part in daily foot and vehicle patrols, you never know what may happen on any given day.
As far as birthdays go this one has been memorable, possibly for all the wrong reasons.
For the past two days I’ve been on a Contractors on Deployed Operations (CONDO) training course as part of my own pre-deployment training.
In a matter of weeks I will have swapped the save haven of Devon for the badlands of Afghanistan.
This will be my third deployment to the war-torn country in the last six years – and by far the longest and most demanding.
More than 1,300 Royal Marines, Royal Navy personnel, Army commandos and reservists from Plymouth will be in charge of providing security in Afghanistan.
I will be living and working alongside hundreds of these servicemen and women for up to three months.
As well as filing stories, blogs and pictures for The Herald and its website, I’ll also be presenting, editing and filming pieces for the British Forces Broadcasting Service (BFBS).
This footage will be beamed to British forces outposts all across the world (think of a dedicated news and programme channel for the forces) as well as the internet (www.bfbs.com/news/).
These stories will also appear on The Herald’s website for you to view.
In the past couple of weeks I have been asked countless times ‘why’ I would want to deploy for such a length of time.
I guess the reason is for the experience. And also to help paint a better picture of what our boys and girls are up to.
So today, in preparation for my trip – or ‘summer holiday’ as some members of staff at Herald HQ are jokingly referring to it – I’m in Buckinghamshire learning how to stay safe while working and living in one of the most dangerous places on the planet.
“BFBS?” the course lecturer and former Royal Marine begins.
“That’s the channel the Taliban watch right?!”
Great.
Lesson one – the biggest threat to British forces personnel deployed on the ground is the Improvised Explosive Device or ‘IED’.
A couple of years ago no-one had heard of an IED. Sadly, due to the rising level of fatalities caused by the nasty device, it’s now become common knowledge. Even my mum knows what an IED is.
In warfare an IED is a key part of fighting, and sadly the Taliban have realised this.
For those who don’t know IEDs – or roadside bombs – are laid to take out either people, or vehicles.
Often they’re not designed to kill. More maim those affected.
The idea is that someone steps on one, loses a leg or legs, and others come to help exposing them to gunfire.
If that’s not nasty enough to read consider this – the Taliban are reportedly running out of shells and explosives left by the Russians when they gave up their war in the country in the 1980s.
Instead they are now making their own bombs filling harmless looking water containers with nuts, bolts and washers to create what is known as a ‘shipyard confetti’ or ‘bucket’ bomb.
“Some are lucky and they lose a foot or suffer an upper body injury,” the course lecturer tells us.
“Some aren’t so fortunate and lose multiple limbs or die.”
Ignorance is bliss at the best of times. Right now I wish I hadn’t been paying attention to the last five minutes.
The lecturer continues with a story about witnessing the atrocities first-hand, and tells us about ‘mine necklaces’ or ‘daisy chains’.
These bombs are linked so that when one goes off and a casualty is dragged to what appears to be a safe place, another goes off in that location.
I’m quick to learn the Taliban have developed their nasty tactics.
Be it radio-controlled, victim operated or suicide bomber vest, the techniques for killing are expanding rapidly.
Aside from first aid, the second major lesson of the CONDO training was all about ‘conduct after capture (including kidnapping, hostage taking and abduction)’.
We’re told ‘to increase the chance of release – stay positive. Also, ‘don’t stare (avoid eye contact)’, ‘follow instructions’, ‘be prepared to be drugged’ and ‘bound and gagged’ and ‘speak when spoken to’.
Although the vast majority of our work in-theatre will be carried out in a British military camp, there will be occasions when we deploy ‘outside the wire’.
So this advice is invaluable. Much like the servicemen and women taking part in daily foot and vehicle patrols, you never know what may happen on any given day.
As far as birthdays go this one has been memorable, possibly for all the wrong reasons.
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